How you make me FEEL!

Hi everyone! I am glad I have brought a broom to dust off the cobwebs from my amazing blog! What happened? My hands have been pretty occupied and the lessons are piling up on each other over my heart/mind and I am praying for inspiration to share them with you.

One of my lessons is the reason for this new post. I was taking a much needed rest and I just remembered this event and the only thing left from this experience was ‘NOBODY WILL REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAY OR DO, THEY WILL ONLY REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL’.

I am so glad that my wandering eyes picked this word of wisdom even though I cannot remember what year or from whence I picked it up because it probably was the only thing that saved me in this event.

Now what is this event?

Remember when I wrote on my unique singing journey: Read>> (HERE) and how interesting it has sure been; (You know life is just a maze and I say this because that thing which want we do not want now is something we once prayed for; that thing we neglect is someone else’s prayer point. What is that thing you are looking down on now?) Anyway, i literally moved outside of my comfort zone and of course singing came along with me to a whole new setting and environment. Now where am I going to?

On a certain day, I was earlier informed by the means of a schedule that I would be leading a particular song. I had dissected the song, made it my own and kept on practicing in the only studio that makes me a star- the bathroom. Fast forward to the day we had the general rehearsal and I started doing my thing. There was a little hitch here and there but nothing unexpected until…..wait for it.. I heard those same words again.. Let XYZ lead the song and Somto (myself) do the adlibs that XYZ was already told to do because she was instructed to do. SIGH… this just felt like dejavu for me and I was thinking, really? All this powers also flew across the Atlantic just to do this to me again??  You know you cannot get used to the feeling of being rejected, but you are strong enough to control what happens after.

I switched singing roles with XYZ and was doing her former part (adlibs) and all of a sudden, they were looking at me in positive shock, exclaiming yes, that’s how the adlib sounded in the original song ( Quick point: do not be afraid to go on new paths, you never know where you will shine effortlessly. Sometimes what you are comfortable with could be your worst enemy.  Did I ever tell you that I was once discouraged from adlibbing? Lol)

Oh well, so as XYZ continued (Quick point: I believe this was the first time XYZ was ever leading a song) leading during rehearsals, I carried myself to where the backups where and few minutes later, I was told to go and stand beside her, not exactly sure why this was necessary as the idea was to have the adlibber at the backup corner. Few minutes later, I was told to follow her up on stage and adlib not just the specific part they initially wanted but the whole song (yes, I was confused too), Towards the end of the rehearsals, I found myself singing a solo and adlibbing the whole song.

Now unto my life-lesson mentioned in the second paragraph, this was XYZ first time leading and even with my own little experience, I noticed where work was needed, and I told her we could practice into the night after people left. The practice was a much needed idea if we didn’t want the audience to chase us off the stage.  This was new to her and I was trying to find a balance, in summary we had WORK to do.

Into the night as we practiced, I saw myself almost losing patience because the same mistakes were being made, instructions were still not followed and she kept singing my own part, I just resolved to letting her have her way and giving 10 percent of my presence and voice with the remaining 90 percent reiterating the instructions, when all of a sudden, I remembered myself.

I remembered that this is the first time two people will lead a song on this stage, this is the first time XYZ is leading this song, this is the first real experience XYZ is having of me, this is the first time I actually felt I was ahead of another in this singing ministry, how am I truly handling this? Am I breaking down her confidence? Am I snapping for lack of patience? Am I singing this because they told me or because they believed I would minister through it? If minister, then why am I giving God 10percent? How am I making XYZ feel? After we are done with the 5 minutes or less on the stage, what taste would I leave in her mouth or mind? What am I exhibiting of myself now? If someone did what I am doing to myself now, how would I truly feel- inspired or dejected? If they ask XYZ to do a duet with me after this, would she refuse?

And then this quote hit me ‘PEOPLE WILL NOT REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAY OR DO, THEY WILL ONLY REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL’.

She is not going to remember my detailed breakdown of how we are to sing the song and make it our own, how I went on an emphasis rant on how she is to stop here and there, how I kept sighing and making snaps in-between, how she is to come in on key and end this way and that way; In my mind I am showing her the path for a pleasant audible ministration, but deep down, I knew my attitude was off and I had to quickly reset it.

I know you might also use the life lesson which says and I paraphrase that you cannot please everyone; Yes I agree to that. However by all means, strive to live peacefully with all men, doing what you can do and always applying the measurement of fairness which is ‘Do unto others as you want others to do unto you’. 

Not neglecting the days of small beginnings because where you were is someone’s present,  where you are was once your future and where you are going is someone’s present.

After XYZ and I ministered the song on the D-Day, let’s say that we left the stage knowing that was not us but God! We were in shock because it surpassed our expectation. People were so blessed that they came to profess it to us!

We are all going somewhere, trampling on someone won’t get you there any faster.

X