Why are some Nigerian mothers hoarding encouragement from their children?

Is there a crime against telling your child or children 'well done'? I do not get it sometimes!

Because I am a mother and a Nigerian, that is the category from which I would draw my inference from.

Why are some Nigerian mothers hoarding praises from their children?

Why is our mouth so heavy to say the below:

'Baby, Great Job!' 

'Well done my son! You gave an outstanding performance' 

'I am proud of you my daughter! you sang so well!' eep at it child. The more you do it, the better you become!

Like the thoughts come to our mind, but our mouths cannot utter it? What is so dangerous about speaking life and encouragement into your children?

I have seen scenarios where a child finishes a performance and the parents would not say one word. ONE WORD! They did not acknowledge the performance. Father and Mother discussed everything but what their child did that day.

Like you would not even know something happened that day.

I am sure you get my point now.

I was truly baffled.

And then we begin to wonder why there is self esteem issues? Of course there would be! When those who are supposed to lift you up, do not even bother lifting a finger, from whence shall you begin?

And we wonder why there is peer pressure- wanting to fit in- because apparently all you do is not enough for your parents so you might as well join those who look like they have some sort of identity.

Can too much praise infuse pride into a child? 

Maybe Yes, Maybe No; At least say one word of praise and see the difference in your child.

It is not about the quantity of the praise. If your child has done an activity, you acknowledge it. As a parent, you have the wisdom to push them forward with your words. Either by saying well done or by saying I know the next one would be better and I am proud of you.

Hoarding praises in your heart, where would that lead to?

Where are your encouragements buried?

Why are we even quick to say well done to a stranger than to our offspring?

Hoarding leads to infestation.

Holding on to praises is just a Full blown 'JUDGE-INA' waiting to happen.

A Judge-ina is someone who cannot see anything good but have given themselves the title of Judge to talk about everyone and everything and never in a positive light.

Rather than say well done, they would say, 'Why were you dancing like that when you were singing?'

'What kind of song was that?' 'Why did you wear that colour of socks to run?'

Less Judge-inas and More parenting.