The word battle against cancer.

My Week has been quite interesting I must say! It started with my last blog http://somtospeaks.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/forgiveness-is-not-of-mouthit-is-of.html I must say that it did lead to more than the usual amount of questions been asked from me and I was glad to be of help ;). I realise more that creativity and emotions are directly proportional to each other and if you doubt me ask Adele or Taylor Swift! LOL

For me, I tend to write easily inside my head towards a topic, a cause, a subject or an emotion I have passed through or have been a part of in one way or the other and that is why when I was invited to Coventry University Campus in London to present a poem on Cancer, my initial reaction as not at all. Why? I have never and will never have any first or second or 1 zillionth experience on it, so I knew it was going to be a very sensitive subject that required sensitive emotions and all I had was sensitive without the emotions; hence my research began.

The charity that organised the event is the http://www.teenagecancertrust.org/ . The teenage cancer trust in one words is Phenomenal. Their work, commitment and vision say it all. Vision- Our vision is a future where young people’s lives don’t stop because they have cancer. We make sure they’re treated as young people first, cancer patients second and everything we do aims to improve their quality of life and chances of survival.

 I moved from one section to another on the website and I am and was truly overwhelmed with emotions. As I read the stories of the young people who have been diagnosed with cancer and their constant victory in the face of pain, tears and weakness, life began to have a different meaning to me. Their perspective of life is so philosophical and makes you take a look at your life and ask yourself some soul searching questions.

One of the cancer patients who passed away has a fund raising project started in his memory and his father’s words on his memorial page ( http://www.teenagecancertrust.org/get-involved/as-a-fundraiser/fundraisers/in-memory-of-jack-chester/ ) says it all.

I find it ironical that sickness enhances ones appreciation for health and death makes one hug life with no remorse but as very busy bees with health perfection and life in 3D with the world to conquer, we get carried away with activities, working around like machines forgetting we are the resource and not the source. Now at this junction, I would like to ask you to say with me, Thank you God in Heaven for your unconditional gift of fulfilled life and perfect health you have graced me with. I appreciate you and I am eternally grateful.

So, after the many emotions contrasting each other, my ploy to write a cancer piece got worse and I was stuck. Literally. I didn't know where to write from… the point of life or the realisation of death. The angle of victory or the battlefield of survival. The focus on appreciation or the limelight of retrospect….

I was stuck…. And then I decided to write this blog a day before the event, and as I do the event tomorrow I would continue writing below on how it went, maybe lessons learnt along the way from today to tomorrow and hopefully  a video when it is out and live!

Hello there!

Shaking like a leaf in the cold is an understatement on how I was prior to been called on the stage. I tried not to make my piece too serious but I knew that I didn't succeed at that, when everyone was completely silent in the auditorium. Silently silent! And I loved every second of every emphasis I put on every word because I knew that I had their attention.

I was able to analyse the characteristics of cancer alongside the characteristics of the mind and this also made me reflect on what kind of thoughts I breed. Thoughts after thoughts, cells after cells, word after word, if one is wrong, it is all a matter of time, all will be wrong.

An excerpt of my piece ‘Do you know that Cancer is not written in the face? That is why you look at someone and cannot tell they have cancer. I look at you and I do not know what you are thinking. Everyone looks normal from the outside, happy, excited, maybe troubled, but for how long?

Cancer is not written on the face, but it does not stay hidden forever. Your thoughts are not written on your face but it will not stay wrapped up forever. Cancer and our thoughts have the same way of exposing themselves, thorough our lives. A single tumor can affect the nerves by putting pressure on it and a single thought out of control can put pressure on any part of our lives.’

Few hours prior to leaving work to the venue, my very own took me through some exercise, he said 'focus, relax you can do this' and yes we did!

It was a very wonderful experience for me and the feedback was humbling taking into consideration that I had few days to prepare on a subject not too familiar. 

For this reason and more, I have consciously decided I would be writing more on things that are outside of me, reaching forth to experiences not yet felt and creating feelings in dimensions, hoping my mind and hand can translate it to some words, that would touch my world. :)

Few things learnt:

Everyone appreciates/or not the finished product but not all can understand the production process. (Another blog for another day).

Out of your comfort zone, lies the uncomfortable strength you are afraid of.

Appreciate life, every moment you can. Do something out of your daily routine every moment you remember. It is your life, a present given to you by God, show Him that you are enjoying it ;)

x