You are BEAUTY-FULL!

I watched a video recently (WATCH HERE>>  https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=354775278011959 ), and I shed tears with no restrain.

This video summarizes a lot we face as women, it was eye opening and liberating at the same time. I used to wonder why it was so easy to go far and beyond for others, but when it comes to ourselves, we put our needs and wants at the very bottom. I used to wonder and it stopped being a thought because i noticed that was/is exactly what had become my reality and I am very confident I am not the only one with this reality.

Is this the nature of women? Someone once said that women are creators and multiplicators and that whatever you give to us is going to multiply, so men should be careful what they give to us. So, if we are naturally gifted into creating and multiplying cares and affection even to the person down the road and this spirals down into their family, how come we don’t do same to ourselves? Is it because in the first instance, we never actually count ourselves as a factor and for that reason we can’t multiply into anything, as we are all aware that whatever you multiply with zero is still zero.

As a girl, lady, woman, daughter, wife, employee, business owner, sister, in-law, friend etc. wearing many caps, there are so many opportunities for our esteem to hit rock bottom, for us to doubt our character, for us to regret, for us to smile, for us to cry, for us to be proud of ourselves, for us to question our motives, for us to fear if we are truly enough? for us to dis-belief the awesomeness that others see in us. Yes, there are so many opportunities for us to question ourselves as women.

Someone might say, that is life in general, but as a woman, I believe we are more in touch with our emotions that if care is not taken, emotions could become our god.

We try so hard to fit in and then try so hard to stand out. If they let us be, we would practically carry the world as women, that is just how we roll and this is why this video (WATCH HERE>>  https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=354775278011959 ) made me cry.

In my video on love (WATCH HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOZ-vgx5uUY  ) I defined love as ‘Love is You’. But it seems that some women have the gift of actually ‘loving’ the world but themselves and yes, love means sacrificing your needs for another but I strongly believe there is a balance.

You cannot give what you do not have. You cannot pull out what is not pushed in.

As women, we should find that ‘thing’ that can pour into us endlessly, so that we can give out endlessly.

For me, it is my relationship with my Heavenly Father in Heaven.

I wrote a poem below and it is stemmed from the perception that as women we are fond of pulling ourselves down. I believe that if we can be our sister's keeper, just maybe, when one of us stares into that mirror, we would see awesomeness and nothing less.

The woman you admire has her own secret struggle, so please do not use her car to judge the essence of your existence.

The model you try to pout like, is struggling with her demons, so do not go to the doctor for that extra lip because you think your life depends on it.

The lady down the street has her head down because her world is literally on her shoulders, so do not dare to judge her, because if you look within, you would not be so different from her.

That girl trying so hard to fit in, that today she is a girl and the next day she is in between, do not scoff at her, you do not go home with her and have no idea who is trying to come in between her, when she uses a pillow as the sponge for her tears

The mother who looks disheveled, you have no right to look down at her, look up at her children and you would see where it all goes.

As women, let us burn to ashes this notion, that when and where we gather, conflict and strife is nearby because we are more than that.

We have always being more and not less.

2012.. winding down

2012 is one year I can say I consciously lived through with eyes wide open and every breeze of emotion was felt by my skin. From January to this present moment, it has been a roller coaster journey that took me to the highest view and to the lowest point, and in both opposing peaks I saw the horizon and then the muddy pebbles.

I remember December 2011 and the things I wrote down to accomplish and with a child’s hand, I give myself a pat at the back for attempting, and still attempting. They say practice doesn't make perfection, it only makes better, and 2012 was my year of ‘better-ment’.

I think in somber reflection I can summarize each months of the year 2012, and I will suggest you do the same. It opens your mind to tests you have buried and testimonies you are yet to share. So please follow me on this journey of month naming J

January- The month of the first step. Apart from it being literal, it was my first step into a fresh slate of plans, love and career.

February- The month of discovery. I unlearned who I was in my Spirit, Soul and Body and started to see me from another perspective. I began to taste a little grain of what I had within me. I took my handi-work up a notch.

March- The month of conclusion. Too soon into the year, I began to solidify my life plans and you never know how your mind can conclude for you when you decide you have found an anchor.  At this point, I had the bases covered, and had concluded, ‘when I am in, I am in’ and I was in, for a while.

April- The month of differentiation-  Many things that happened this month made me realise that different was also very different from different. Basically different has variables and I just got myself a degree of that.

May- The month of forced reality-  I had my graduation ceremony  this month, and I re-lived the journey of my academic years, tears, and cares. I saw my ex class mates and for few days, we relived every single month and saw how far we had moved on, but friends for life, we were. This was also the month; I broke a positive personal record. After graduation and an experience that happened on the last day, I was forced back to reality.

June- The month of decisions- One of the happiest months of my entire life. I had a dream come through as I hosted my mum. It was also another time I thought I had it all figured out. I thought I was ahead and everything was in check. Only if I knew how wrong I was down the line J

July- The month of checkmate- Fully aware this was the second half of the year; I was in tune with things happening around me. The issue however, was I was trying so hard to hold them together. I got involved in personal development engagements, I started using more of my time, but spent few seconds on myself, but I was enjoying it all. it was as if I had found the balance and I was in the middle. Perfect positioning

August: The month of action not words: This month summarises when you decide to stop saying and start acting. To give you a hint: ‘For God so love the world that He gave’. I gave up a key part of my life this month and in reality not expecting anything back. It was simply a sacrificing phase. You sometimes pray over your seeds and hope the heaves open on them.

September: The month of dropping oceans: You never know how strong you are, until strong is the only thing left for you to be. I was about to have another year added to me and at this point the new year starting from January was a fade and all I could think was where I was, the age I was and where I thought I would be. I remember the middle of the last year, I wanted to write a book on my poems before my birthday and one year later, the book was yet to be ready. I dissected myself, spirit, soul and body and trust me, mind was a battle. There were houses built in my mind and the occupants were not paying rent, thanks to me J

October: The month of bucketful: I was really excited in this month because I was older but talked myself out of raising the bar so high for myself. I was very grateful to God for everything He had brought my way. Job, family, love and testimonies. So I had great expectations for my day, which ended up in my packing the dropping oceans in a bucket. When we have great expectations, we create room to be disappointed.

November: The month of falling scales: I was so excited for this month because my sister was getting married and I was the Chief. I have never been the Chief Brides’ maid and also never been in the situation to get a dress one day before my trip. My entire wedding experience was one of my year’s highlight and I experienced love and happiness in a way I had not just by looking. You have no eyes what the eyes can do to your mind just by staring J

December: The month of mind renewal: This was the epic of a brewing situation that burnt me because I was in the middle of the battle with no weapon. All I had was my hormones which were at this time completely tired of me, but one tiny winy hormone still saw the light at the end of the tunnel and in the 2^nd week of December, my life turned a corner. Light.

Words cannot do justice to 2012 because above is the grain of sand in the beach; but I thank God for everything I might have gone through because I went through them and been blessed with the gift of Life and living it to the fullest. I thank God for everyone who has come into my life and I thank God for your own life.

2013.. Fast approaching and in these days leading to the new season,  I have visited the future so many times with my 11^th hour miracle, and every time I take a peek into 2013 it is filled with un-explainable favour, glorious future, exciting changes, mind blowing testimonies, seconds filled with unconditional love and most importantly divine results. This is all our human eyes can see but holding on to 1 Corinthians 2 vs 9 – No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.

Are you excited for your future? Be excited. You are not just a pawn, you are a key player in your generation! As long as you have a heart, you can be courageous. 

x

Just Do It.

I remember when I used to fill all the forms by employers and the part that asks the question’ what is your hobby?’ and I see my hands writing ‘Thinking’. It sounded so smart back then and in fact it is really something that I do. #don’t blame the first child of five, it comes natural to me#.

As I have managed to grow one white hair, I realise that thinking might seem smart but doing is way smarter. I had and still have so many great thinkers as friends and with my white hair, I am beginning to see the difference between those who have so many papers with ideas (just as myself) and those working through those papers (fingers crossed).

In the Beginning, God said, it is not good for man to be alone; we need to create him a help mate. He spoke it loud, and did not wait for the board of directors to sit on it, or His friend(s) to approve, He did not wait unending for the perfect timing neither did He go around thinking up one million and one ideas. He said it, had the creative plan in His mind, waited for the opportunity and executed. It was so perfect that even Man himself acknowledged that this beautiful creature called Woman was taken from his ribs! (Gen 2 vs. 18- 24).

They say it takes about 20 seconds to remember something and therefore it is very important to document them. So much emphasis is on writing the vision down but what about making it plain? Making it plain means doing your research, going to the drawing board, breaking it down and meditating on it. What about let him that run that readeth it? People running with it means you have gone beyond that paper and are now executing it in motion. (Habakkuk 2 vs. 2)

So many ideas are created and buried in a piece of paper. We are making the step of thinking and wanting to make the difference but think about it, the only difference most of us have made is to the paper industry as we buy more to write more. 

What are we afraid of? When was the last time we did something for the first time? Are we afraid of Failure? Are we afraid that our ideas sound ridiculous? Are we afraid that we might not be able to handle all this? Are we afraid of our great our destiny  that we decide to settle for the average one we find ourselves in?

What right do you have to pass through this world just as an ordinary fella? If the ants can go about their business diligently, how about us? Take a look at the sky below, yet you have not heard of stars fighting to protect their space and that is because there is so much space for everyone above, and the reason why there would forever and ever be space up there is because of the fear to climb that ladder and know what above holds in store for us.

Nike slogan says, just Do it.

Just do it, even if you think you would be laughed at. Why? They would soon be laughing with you. Just do it, even if you think there is no provision yet. Why? Because if it is a God given vision, there is a God given provision available. Just do it, even if you are not sure of the results. Why? At least there would be a result and either way it turns out you would be one step wiser.

Let’s do it. Why? We have no right to be ordinary in this world. Look at you, you are definitely not ordinary!